The Knicks Finally Won One… God Help Us All
The Day I Never Wanted To See Has Finally Arrived Ladies and gentlemen… I'm sick. I'm disgusted. I'm appalled. I might need a gallon of bleach, a shower, and a Detroit-style coney dog just to cleanse my soul after typing these words. Because the NEW YORK KNICKS ARE NBA CHAMPIONS. Yes. Those New York Knicks. The same fanbase that talks like they won a title every season despite not having touched a championship trophy since Richard Nixon was in office. The same Knicks fans who
2 days ago4 min read
SERENA IS BACK! The GOAT Just Unretired And Tennis Better Be Ready
Damn it. The GOAT QUEEN is back. Did you hear me? THE GOAT QUEEN. At 44 years old, Serena Williams officially announced Monday that she's coming out of retirement and returning to professional tennis. And honestly? I feel like a kid who just found out school got canceled five minutes before the bus arrived. I'm hyped. I'm excited. And I'm also sitting here wondering what in the name of tennis history made Serena wake up one morning and say: "Y'all know what? Let me go terror
Jun 14 min read
The Alien Arrives: Wemby Leads Spurs To NBA Finals
Damn. Victor Wembanyama done messed around and got the San Antonio Spurs back to the NBA Finals already. ALREADY! Three years into his career. Three! I don't know whether to be impressed, terrified, or call Adam Silver and ask if this brotha was built in a secret laboratory somewhere underneath Area 51. Because what we're watching doesn't make sense. The Spurs knocked off the defending champion Oklahoma City Thunder in Game 7 and punched their ticket to the NBA Finals for the
May 314 min read
The Mavericks Fired Jason Kidd… But The REAL Problem Started with the Luka Doncic Trade
Ladies and gentlemen… the Dallas Mavericks finally made it official. Hall of Fame point guard Jason Kidd is OUT as head coach of the Mavericks after five seasons in Dallas. And in the words of the organization itself: “We have mutually agreed to part ways with head coach Jason Kidd.” MUTUALLY? Come on now. That’s corporate America talk for "Yeahhhhhh… we’re going in another direction.” Translation? Jason Kidd got fired. And honestly? After the last two years in Dallas, this w
May 214 min read
Detroit Got EMBARRASSED on Its Own Floor in Game 7
Damn it! I’m sick. Not “I need soup and cough medicine” sick. I’m talking about the kind of sick where you stare at the wall after the game ends, wondering if your TV owes you an apology. Because what I witnessed Sunday night at Little Caesars Arena? DISGUSTING. APPALLING. DOWNRIGHT NASTY WORK. The Cleveland Cavaliers walked into Detroit and beat the BRAKES off my Pistons 125-94 in Game 7 of the Eastern Conference Semifinals. Thirty-one points. At HOME. IN DETROIT. A 30-ball
May 184 min read
Pistons Embarrass Cavs in Cleveland to Force Game 7
They say REVENGE is a dish best served cold. Well, guess what? The Pistons served Cleveland a plate colder than a Michigan winter bus stop on 7 Mile at 6 a.m. And the Cavs ate EVERY last bite of it. Because after blowing Game 5 in heartbreaking fashion at Little Caesars Arena — after leading by nine points with just over three minutes left — my Pistons marched into Rocket Arena Friday night and beat the BRAKES off Cleveland 115-94 to force a Game 7 back in Detroit. That’s rig
May 153 min read
Pistons Blow Game 5 To Cavs, Season Now on Life Support
Damn it, man. I’m sick. Like REAL sick. The kind of sick where you stare at the ceiling after the game, wondering why you even care this much about basketball in the first place. Because my Detroit Pistons absolutely handed Game 5 away Wednesday night at Little Caesars Arena. HANDED IT AWAY. The Cleveland Cavaliers walked into Detroit — despite being 0-5 on the road this postseason — and escaped with a 117-113 overtime win to take a 3-2 lead in the Eastern Conference semifina
May 143 min read
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